Tuesday, July 11, 2006

Soul searching

Been feeling kinda restless lately. Not that I don't enjoy my free time & being, somewhat, a 'lady of leisure', as some might put it. But perhaps its the guilt complex in me, or the work ethic that's been drilled into me from school days, through med school & internship & through my working life that in order to be a productive citizen of society, one has to work & contribute to the economy.

I thought that I had gotten over it last year in the first few months of non-working life. But I guess I haven't. This feels slightly different, though. I know that there has to be more to life than lounging by the pool, reading novels, having foot massages/facials, watching matinees in a non-crowded theatre or going to The Sale Worth Waiting For at Robinson's at off-peak hours. There are probably tai-tai's out there who would disagree, but I'm not one of them. (I do appreciate the luxury of being able to linger over a leisurely lunch with a friend without having to worry about rushing back to the clinic to clear the post-lunch crowd.)

However, the thought of going back to clinical practice is still quite abhorrent to me. In fact it evokes a rather unpleasant fluttery feeling in my stomach just thinking about it. I'm just not ready yet. I need to find something to do other than Practise Medicine. What that something is, I have yet to discover.


pretzel said...

How about lecturing the young medicine undergrads or those student nurses??

OR volunteer to be one of the tutors for those young GPs doing the postgrad courses? With your wealth of experience, it's such a shame not to share with the younger generation of Drs some survival tips, etc...

OR tag along those medical teams that are affiliated to church groups that go around the neighborhoods giving medical care to those needy people? There are several Drs and nurses in our church that are involve in this too. One of our church pastors is a trained Dr (shld be just 1-2 yrs your junior batch)

not your typical full-time clinical job, allows u to make some contribution back to society, and flexi-arrangement/schedule. :)

Anonymous said...

You quitted the medical field after so many years of hard work?
May I know what is the main reason behind that decision?
Soul searching is never an easy case for me. I'm also doing that* now.
I don't know the reason I am living for, yet I dare not to make any decision coz I'm just scared, scared of anything and everything under the sun. And also, I'm not sure of anything about myself. I doubt I ever know myself.
So how do we often get out of this kinda nightmare?

aliendoc said...

pretzel: thanx for the suggestions...yeah, I have thought of doing those things before. But I don't want to do something just for the sake of doing it. I want to find something that I can feel passionate about, you know?

warm stranger: maybe one of the reasons I quit is because of all the hard work??? I wrote about my reasons for quitting in one of my earlier entries (Dec 2, 2005).