Saturday, July 22, 2006

A Doc's Life - More Memorable Moments (P.S. 3)

Subject: Sex Ed for Dummies – I know it is impolite to call someone a dummy, but after you have read this encounter, you’ll know where I’m coming from…

Patient is a female of child-bearing age. This is not an isolated case but a fairly commonly encountered experience.

Patient: “ Dr, there’s something wrong with me; my menses is late. It was supposed to come 2 weeks ago. It’s usually very accurate.”

Me: “Are you married?”

Patient: “Yes,”

Me: ”Do you or your husband use any form of contraception?”

Patient: “Er, no.”

Me: “Do you have symptoms like breast tenderness, nausea, loss of appetite…?”

Patient: “Er, ya, actually my breasts have been feeling a bit tender & my appetite is not so good.”

Me: “Well, you may be pregnant. Let’s do a urine test to check, shall we?”

Patient: “But it cannot be! We just got married last month & we were not planning to have a baby till one or two years later!”

Me: “Err…you don’t use any contraception…?”

Patient: “No.”

Me (patiently): “OK, then you may be pregnant. We can confirm it with a urine test.”

Patient exits room with a doubtful expression on her face…

Pregnancy test comes back Positive.

Me: “Congratulations! You are pregnant!”

Patient: “How did this happen? We were not planning for a baby……..” etc. etc…


Sigh…I sometimes wished that I could have told these patients that mind-control & will power are usually not terribly effective methods of contraception....

6 comments:

Andrew said...

Wow... I've been pseudo-randomly searching for blog stories about marriage and relationships that might fit with my site. This one is quite an eye-opener! It reminds me of the old joke:

What do you call a couple who use the rhythm method?

Parents.

aliendoc said...

Good one, Andrew!

Dr Oz bloke said...

Hmm maybe there is more than meets the eye?

Was the husband silent? Maybe the husband wanted the kid? Maybe the wife didn't?

I guess it's frustrating. The big question is what this mother would do subsequently.

aliendoc said...

Dr Oz: No husband/s with any of the patients who came. I think that they honestly didn't think they were pregnant!!!

angry doc said...

An older male colleague once expressed puzzlement over the fact that his wife was pregnant again, despite the fact that their last... er... well, it was her 'safe' period. Nevertheless, he was rather proud that he 'still had it'.

I didn't have the heart to offer an alternative explanation to him.

igakunogakusei said...

Sex Ed (preferably one that is practical and not religiously entwined) is obviously in need of improvement in Singapore. Such ignorance is laughable!

I'm sure even populations in some 3rd World countries are less ignorant.